Even though my fiancée was extremely curious about the experience I was about to have, I reiterated several times that no, he could not come; this was an assignment that I had to complete on my own in order to truly feel the sense of being an "other."
Interestingly enough, I did not feel as "other"-like as I had anticipated. I felt like a fish out of water as soon as I walked into the building. The building was definitely an old one and it was unclear as to which area was the area where the service would be held. After I wandered around aimlessly for a couple minutes trying to find my place, I found the congregational area. There was a table inside the entrance with an assortment of pamphlets, business cards, and other pertinent information regarding The Way and it's beliefs. There was also a special pile of enveloped marked for visitors. I took one of these envelopes and sat in the fifth row, perusing the contents of the envelope. Inside the envelope were pamphlets about The Way's basic beliefs, information about the pastor, information about worship times, and information about the church community as a whole. It was very user friendly and in a language I could clearly understand. They even had accommodations for Spanish speakers. After several minutes, I soon realized that tonight was not a mass worship night, but rather an adult study group that was a lot more intimate. The leader Sheighlah beckoned me to move up a few rows and join the group. They were just beginning a short lesson from the book THis New Life about the healing power of Jesus. It was very interesting and I agreed with many of the things that Sheighlah said. At the end of the short meeting, I met two of the other five companions, June and Spencer. June was extremely eager to get me involved and make sure I felt welcome and even went out of her way to tell me about a young adult activity that would be happening on Thursday. Sadly, this did not work with my schedule and I informed her I would not be able to attend. I then had a very wonderful discussion with Spencer and Sheighlah and was able to get to know them and tell them about my religious experience and membership in the Mormon church. At first I was hesitant to tell them I was Mormon because I was afraid they might throw me out or call me a devil child, but in reality they were very interested in me as a person and appreciated the effort I was making to become educated about other religions. I learned that I felt most like the "other" when I refused to open up or communicate with anyone. However, as soon as I spoke to these lovely people, I felt very comfortable and welcome and even though we had our differences, it was a very safe and non-hostile space.
In the future, I will have much more empathy for people who feel like the "other" in various spheres of life. I cannot imagine having the feeling of constant pressure to pay attention and not miss any unspoken cues as an inherent part of my schooling experience, but that is something that many immigrant or foreign exchange students experience every day in the classroom. As a teacher, I will do my best to make my students feel welcome and relaxed, just as June, Sheighlah, and Spencer did when I visited their church. Furthermore, I will take special time to talk to any students who seem to be experiencing "other-ness" and fill them in on any unspoken rules of my classroom that I might otherwise assume my students know ahead of time. This is not to say that I will project any single stories onto students who are experiencing "other-ness;" rather than assuming their needs I will also take time to ask them what is making them uncomfortable and let them know that they can talk to me before or after class about discomforts whenever they arise.
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